The Bravery of Repentance – Father Theologos

To get out of the difficulties and troubles of this life we ​​need repentance. To repent we need courage.

Watch this video to find out more about how to repent and get rid of the sins that beset us.

Enjoy!

Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever and unto the ages and ages. Amen. Through the prayers of our Holy Fathers, Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us! Amen.

Brethren, we have all sinned and we all sin. If you remember, I talked about repentance as the path to liberation, drawing conceptual, guiding lines. We have also shown that people in the world can perform much greater asceticism than those who repent without analogous results. After this I showed what is the worst result of sin: suicide – God forbid!

Today we will go into more concrete detail by discussing what and how we should do and what we should avoid when it comes to our repentance. We go into it more thoroughly, brothers. First of all, you must know that the zeal, the warmth of the soul, is the most important – because I have seen unclean souls madly possessed by the love of the body, but who took this trial of love as cause for repentance and turned with the same love to the Lord, and immediately jumping over all fear grafted themselves insatiably into the love of God.

I remember Saint Porphyrios seeing on the street a woman dressed very indecently, and the brothers were judging that woman and Saint Porphyrius said:

Don’t judge her! This woman has a very high capacity for love for God, for love for God, but she is headed in the wrong direction, because she does not know, the poor woman. Well, if this woman could turn her fierce and powerful love to God, she would be greater than many of us. Do you understand? You know that there are many saints who have been like this: Saint Mary Magdalene, Saint Mary of Egypt and others. Do you understand? That is why the Lord also said about Mary Magdalene, about that loose woman, not that she was afraid, but that she loved much and could easily exchange sinful love for spiritual love. Do you understand? You see that even in Revelation the Lord says,

“I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth.”

Do you understand? Yes, brethren, we must have zeal, otherwise we will not live. The flame of life comes from the flame of zeal. Here, as I said earlier, there is a problem with self-confidence, confidence in thoughts. We must obey, brethren, we must have humility because we who have fallen into the pit of iniquity cannot get out of there unless we have previously plunged into the pit of humility, if we have not sunk into the abyss of humility, as St. John of the Ladder says. Do you understand? That is, in order to get out of the pit of iniquity, we must sink into the pit of humility.

Now one is the sorrowful humility of those who weep, and another is the chastisement of conscience bordering on despair – God forbid! – of those who still sin. We talked about it a little more at length when we talked about suicide – God forbid, brothers! – Always have courage, courage! On the other hand, another is of course the happy richness of humility that arises in those perfected through God’s work. So there is humility from God, and there is also the one who humbles himself out of fear of God. But there is also a humility of desiring God. For him who humbles himself for the fear of God there follows a temperance of his body, with a calming of all feeling, and a contrite heart at all times. And to him who humbles himself out of joy follows much simplicity and a heart that grows and cannot be held. It’s a heart that grows in God’s grace, in the ambience of His love, which cannot be stopped from its joy and flight to God. Flight to God’s loving heights. This is an overwhelming humility in its richness, fostered by the ever-increasing experience of God’s endlessness. This is a gift from God, brethren. It is difficult to put into words, brethren, you have to experience it [to understand it].

Do you understand? For us ordinary people, the proof that we repent and have humility is that we endure reproach. Let us not forget that we have sinned and are worthy of it. Now you’re going to say that maybe we’re being unjustly reproached.

If this happens, of course the one who reproaches us will give an answer, but let us remember that if we have not made the mistake for which we have been reproached, we surely have made some other mistake for which we should pay, as it says in Scripture. In some you earn and in others you pay.

Or maybe God wants to show us worthy of Him. The good Lord knows. Likewise the Savior unjustly suffered. Either way, we must suffer reproaches —I know it’s hard, sometimes—we must suffer because it benefits us and softens our hearts, and pray for the one who reproaches us as to maintain our love. God’s purpose is to soften our hearts. If we soften it by ourselves, God no longer sends us reproaches, but if we don’t soften and are strong like that, we have trust in ourselves, then God sends those to soften our hearts.

The heart must be fluffy, it must be spiritual, it must not be stone. Do you understand? We must remain with love for everyone and escape loneliness—of course, also feel God’s grace. We must humble ourselves for this, because if we are alone, the torment of remembering sin eats us much more, even if we repent and weep for it.

So be careful with loneliness, brethren. The loneliness [that is] not according to God, but loneliness stemming from sin, lack of love, lack of communion with others and with God. Now God’s judgments and why a fall happens, a sin, a very dark and incomprehensible problem for us. We do not know what falls happen to us due to our carelessness, neglect, or too much worldly care – that is, spiritual carelessness – which fall is due to abandonment through God’s economy (with a good purpose, of course), which is because of God turning away from us. Do you understand?

But someone told us, Saint Silouan – remember if you have read the book of Saint Silouan – that which happen to us by God’s economy generate a speedy return. Because God, who has allowed them to happen, does not allow them to hold us for too long. You see, in the case of St. Silouan, we had two moments: at first a deception took place due to inexperience and he quickly healed from it. After that, however, he had a long war with devils because his soul had knowledge— limited of course—to fight and was no longer a beginner in spiritual matters.

Due to the fact, however, that it was about pride – that is, Saint Silouan suffered from pride, if you remember from the book – this struggle was very long and tough, and until the Lord revealed to him the words “Keep your mind in hell and do not despair”, until then he had not found a solution to his existential problem. And it was Saint Silouan at his best. To keep our minds in hell means that we must accept that we belong to hell, brethren, that is, we can’t save ourselves– to see our faults bravely and humbly, but not to despair of God’s help, as God does save us.

One needs a lot of hope in God. Perhaps it would be good to briefly explain what hope in God means. What is the difference between faith and hope. See, how can I tell you?… You see we now have some big construction going on around here, we’re putting in some solar panels, we’re expanding—and we need help, maybe you can hear the sounds of the workers from above—so I think, I have faith that a big company abroad can help us, but I don’t hope it will help us, you know? I think they have the financial strength to help us, but I don’t hope that they will help us.

Do you understand? That’s the point— the difference between hope and faith.

In God’s case, I believe He can help us, and I hope in Him that He will indeed help us. And in the Mother of God, of course! The Mother of God never leaves us. We must have hope in God and in the Mother of God!

We are very calm, brethren, if we have hope—glory be to God. But this comes from spiritual experience. As I said, the devil tries to make us think about why this happened, why the other, what is the cause of the fall, and so on. Of course, it is good to think a little, to have awakening, watchfulness – as the Holy Fathers say – to find the causes of sins, but if we see that we do not find them, then let us get out of there quickly, brethren, because the enemy pushes us into some labyrinths from which we will hardly be able to get out afterwards. Do you understand?

Why that, why that, why that… He’s going to paralyze us through analysis and mazes and thoughts like why this, why that, and so on, and he’s working us like laundry in the washing machine. It’s not good, brethren, it’s not good! Do you understand? That’s the war of thoughts.

Immediately we [must] cut that out. Cut right away! Because the devil’s purpose is to cut off our prayer, to deprive us of prayer. If, however, the cause is obvious and conscience rebukes us, of course the cause must be avoided and we must repent, but if we do not know and are in the dark about why something happened, then we better pray that God will enlighten us with courage.

Speaking of the devil’s stratagems to stop our prayer and repentance, you must know that we must fight first of all with the devil of sorrow, brethren, because if we have sinned – and we all sin, brothers – he comes next to us when we pray and reminds us of our boldness before we sinned: how it used to be, how beautiful it was, and so on. And He wants us to stop praying and pushes us into despair to fall into this pit of melancholy. It pushes us into discouragement and because of this, if we have gaps in attention, in prayer, brethren, know that the devil will fight us and finish us. When I say gaps, I mean, brethren, when you stop praying, working, paying attention and leave your mind unguarded, free to wander. The mind having been left unguarded, we struggle, as I said, remembering our former boldness, that is, “how good we were” and so on. Understand? … we no longer feel in prayer and in our hearts boldness towards God or the living connection with Him that we once had, and this makes us sad and we stop praying, like some who would not be in the proper state of prayer now. Brethren, we must do quite the opposite. We must persist in prayer, even if it is not always fervent and gathered entirely in thought on God.

This strategy is one of the devil’s most dangerous races. Thus, by continually waiting for the proper state of prayer, we will never pray again. Let us be very careful, because many are the devil’s snares until he makes us powerless. It’s very dangerous, especially because he wants to push us into despair by saying “You won’t escape”, “where are you going to escape? You have no repentance! You’re going to fall again.” Do you understand?

DO NOT pay attention to thoughts! We’ve said it a million times, we’re saying it again. Do you understand? Sorrow for God is joy in seeing yourself striving to do God’s will. Sorrow for God says, “Do not be afraid. Come again! Come on, come on! Don’t worry!” It does not weigh on a person, it does not double a person over. The person who knows that God is strong and strengthens him is also strong; that man does not give up, and this is the power of those who want to acquire virtues. That is, if man falls, let him not be discouraged, but be careful again of salvation. 10 times we fall into sin, 10 times we rise; we rise and we fall 70 times seven as the Scripture says; meaning, infinite times, that’s what it means. So, brethren, there are two kinds of sorrow: useful and harmful sorrow, corrupting, terrible. Do you understand?

Useful sorrow, according to God, is that which weeps for one’s own sins, that is, the repentance we are talking about, while devilish sorrow is like a boot that crushes every flower of your soul. Brethren, I have said it before and I say it again: the devil always aims at courage because courage is the driving force that pushes man forward. And because it cannot strike man directly in courage, it first tries to make him sin so that he has reason to discourage him.

We will never be discouraged because if we sin, the devil has won a battle—if we get discouraged, he has won the war.

Because many of you ask what the sin against the Holy Spirit is, the one which is never forgiven – because this is what it says in Holy Scripture that the sin against the Holy Spirit is never forgiven; brethren, the sin against the Holy Spirit is despair. And it is never forgiven because man himself no longer wants to be forgiven, understand? God is all-powerful and all-loving and perfect, with perfect respect for human freedom, even though it may cause eternal torment. So if the person wants to be forgiven and prays “Lord, forgive me!” God, respecting his freedom of choice, forgives him. If, however, a person despairs in regard to his life and God’s help and does not want to be forgiven, then – God forbid! God respects his freedom of choice. A terrible drama, brethren! A great drama.

Let’s not forget that God loves us to the fullest, and, think, [how it must feel] should someone see his son die because he can no longer resist because of his sins. Of course, God is above all this, much higher, but it is good, somehow, to think of it this way because it shows us a bit the magnitude of God’s love, who created man, eternally to be like Him, and man foolishly despairs and misses his purpose. For this reason, brethren, let us not be troubled if we fall every day, nor let us get out of the battle.

But let us stand bravely, brethren, and surely our guardian angel will cherish our patience. Do you understand? Our guardian angel and God’s grace will cherish us very much. Here, however, it is essential to know that our wound is easy to heal while it is still fresh and warm. But the old, unkempt and twisted ones are difficult to heal and need a lot of toil, iron, razors and the fire that accompanies them for healing.

Abba Dorotheos, Saint Dorotheos of Gaza tells of a case where an improved father, an Abba, told a disciple in front of other fathers to pull a small plant out of the ground. He effortlessly pulled it out with one hand, snatched it away. Then he obeyed him to pull out of the ground a small bush, yes, as you see around me.

Stopping and struggling a little, he managed to uproot that one too. Then he sent him to pick up a young tree – you see around me, yes. There, no matter how hard he tried, he failed. Then Abba commanded two or three more brothers to help him, and finally, helping each other, they laboriously pulled out the tree. After this, Abba sent them to pull out a large tree, as you can see, brethren. There they realized that no matter how hard they tried, they would not be able to get it out. They would need an axe, brethren. So it is with passions – they get out much easier when they are small, brethren. When you’re young. I am addressing mainly young people, but let the elderly not be discouraged either. Because if one’s passions get old and become habitual, you need an axe, brethren.

St. Basil the Great says that habit is second nature. We say that much is done with unhealable weather, but, brethren, with God everything is possible. As long as we live in this life, as long as we have the possibility of repentance, it is possible to become better, we can repent with God’s help. And we can repent because God gives us time.

If God knows that we can no longer repent, He would not give us time, because time is given for repentance and God is perfect and does not do things for nothing. God is a loving Father, He acts in our best interest—He does not act neutrally. The devils say that God is a lover of men before a fall, but after a fall they say He is a harsh judge. Why? At first they say so to make us sin—that it doesn’t matter…—and then to throw us into despair, that is, to cut off our repentance, brethren. Let’s not believe our thoughts – I repeat myself! – which tell us when we have sinned, “Eh, it’s nothing—it doesn’t matter” – only the confessor can tell us that it doesn’t matter so as not to let us despair. On the other hand, let’s not listen to the other extreme either, which says, “That’s it! You’re done! You’re lost! There is no salvation for you!” The extremes are from the devil.

The virtues are always at the center. God is the center of our existence in every way. Orthodoxy is the solution to balance – especially today. Yes, Orthodoxy is truly the path to holiness, but – especially today, as I said – Orthodoxy appears as the way, as the only way we can maintain our balance, brethren, through which we can keep our minds whole. You see how crazy it is outside Orthodoxy. And this is achieved through courage, through bravery, the bravery of repentance that generates constancy in the spiritual program that slowly but surely leads us to perfection, to holiness as I said. Come on, let’s not back down!

Let’s not despair if our thoughts say something or if people or other say things, like all the news out there about the apocalypse happening. Brethren, do not despair! Despair is the sin against the Holy Spirit. Courage! Courage that the Lord God, the Lover of mankind is with us!

And He wants to give us the Kingdom, He wants to make us like Himself. Do you understand? And we have to fight, we have to have this bravery inside us and not get soft from living well. Because you know what they say – comfort breeds complacency. But if we fight and don’t back down in front of thoughts and other people and news that say to despair, we will prevail! If we are men, we will be victorious. And I am referring here, of course, to ladies as well, ladies who are very worthy, very brave women, and women, you know, kept the nation as a last resort. So courage!

May the good God help us! Through the prayers of our Holy Fathers, Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us! Amen.

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