Advice for the Youth of the 21st Century – Fr. Pimen Vlad

Listen to a word of wisdom from Father Pimen, in which he offers today’s children some very useful advice so that they can live a happy childhood and, later on, a happy life.

Enjoy!

We meet again, my dear ones. What do I want to talk to you about? Now I want to address the children more. Look, Ursuleț came here too [a cat]. Yes, Ursuleț, you’ll let me talk, won’t you? I want to address myself more to children. When we say children, we refer especially to those up to 18 years old, although we are children as long as our parents live, it doesn’t matter how old we are, what age we reach. As long as our parents live, we are children. Look at Ursuleț, he wants to be pampered. He heard me talking about children and he wants attention too.

What do I want to say? What does childhood mean? How beautiful is childhood? I know many of you don’t appreciate it right now. Do you know why? Because you’re living it, you have it. When the years go by, you will miss it. No matter how it sometimes seems to us: that it’s hard, that it is unfair, that we are not allowed certain things. No, dear ones, childhood is very beautiful, childhood remains childhood, even if sometimes it is harder, because during childhood you have no worries or if you do, very few. You don’t come up against all the hardships, like grown-ups, to have the experience of life, to look ahead, to think about what you’re going to do. No, when you are a child, everything is beautiful, even bright, we could say.

Even if sometimes there are situations when children have a harder time – in the family there is not as much understanding from the parents, maybe the parents do not get along properly, but childhood remains childhood. I know maybe you’ll say that, well, thinking about my own childhood, it was not easy, think that during the communists’ era it was quite difficult, we didn’t have everything on a platter, as now. We couldn’t afford almost anything that you, children of today, can afford. We only had toys if we made them ourselves, wood carved. In fact, our toys were the living ones: we had animals at home, we had sheep, in the spring we had lambs, we had a cow, we had piglets, dogs. All those that go into a man’s household in the countryside. These animals were our living toys, which had to be cared for, fed, cleaned. So our play was a kind of responsibility, you had to go to the stable to take care of the animals, to look after them. It was like a kind of play, but it prepared you for life, not like now, plush toys everywhere, which you throw away at some point because you’re tired of childhood.

Now I’ll address myself to… What should I begin with? With the boys. They are seeing a lot now, too soon, you are immersed in this virtual world, with phones, with all these and you are no longer living your childhood. It’s the same with girls, the same thing happens. You end up not rejoicing, not meeting those like you, playing football, playing around, spending your energy, rejoicing in each other, talking to each other. Without getting into harmful things. Many start smoking now, as juveniles, then even drinking, drugs, because temptation appears: “Come on, what if you take a little? You’re stupid that you don’t! Look, you’re not cool like us, smoking, drinking, taking drugs!” Do not do this! Try the good things, not the bad ones!

After a bad thing starts, the devil also contributes and it gets worse and worse, until he destroys you. After that, when the children grow up a little more, gambling appears, the temptation to win money and destruction occurs again. But with that money we work for, or with that given by our parents, you can do something with it. Don’t think that you will win at games, you will not win! Be careful with this, don’t self-destruct. Try to enjoy childhood, do not rush to grow up. Try, as far as you can, to finish your school, to study. Combine playing with responsibility and studying.

I mean, try to live beautifully, but try to spend your physical energy. Don’t spend time on the Internet until you go crazy and then you’re angry, because that’s harming you. As I said, run, play football, especially those of you who live in the city, do a sport where you can spend your energy after school. It should always be a sport, something. Now, the temptations are big, they start on the Internet and destroy you. You’re not enjoying childhood anymore, and you end up with addiction, and addiction robs you of childhood’s joy.

I’m referring to the little girls now, for girls there is a temptation towards maturing. You see fashion presented on the Internet, that they are getting their hair dyed, and you want it too. You put your childhood toys aside and get into these, why so much hurry?! You’ll get tired of lipsticks and all that when you grow up. You should never get to them, but at least let the joy of childhood stay. Let it stay so you can rejoice in it. Don’t try to grow up, to want to dress like those who advertise on the internet and so on. No, [have] nice, light, loose clothing so you can play, you can run. Wear decent clothing, you don’t have to stand out when you are a child, what do you want to show, what do you want to present as a little girl? Try to be the little girl who has a teddy bear, who is glad she has it, that is not a shame.

Those of you who are in the countryside, in nature, especially little girls, try to accompany mother in the kitchen, to learn everything there. It doesn’t matter how much you can do, you put your little hands there, you help, but you learn, because if you grow up learning, by the age of 14, 15, 16, 17 you will be able to do anything in the kitchen. You can manage in life, wherever you are, you don’t sit and think about the fact that you don’t know how to make a meal, you don’t know how to handle yourself, that the years go by, and you don’t know what life has in store for you. Learn, learn as much as you can next to your mother, everything you can.

Now let me refer to both boys and girls. Don’t get too big for your boots that you know everything, because you don’t. No matter how capable you are, no matter how genius you are, how good you were at school, you don’t have the experience of life. Parents, grandparents have life experience and do you know what it means? It means that they have been through a lot of things and when they tell you something, they tell you something they’ve been through, not something they haven’t been through, or anything like that.

Maybe they’ve made mistakes in life, who knows, but they went through them Don’t be ashamed to ask them: “Father, mother, how did you do in your time? Here’s what I’m going to do, what I’d like to do. Tell me from your own experience, so that I don’t knock my head so it’ll hurt me later.” And even more so with grandparents, who have gathered experience. They have also caught the old times of communism, hardships. You do not realize how valuable the elders’ experience is.

Ask them, as children, and keep your ear to the ground to learn, and as boys, especially, when you see that something is being made, something is being crafted by father, or by someone in the family, go and take advantage of it, get close and make use of it. Try as much as you can to learn, because if you learn, you do well wherever you go. Even if you study something and it doesn’t work in that field anymore,you know how to do something right away. At home, if something has broken, you know how to fix it because you have learned.

Learn in any field, I mean, do not despise it when someone wants to teach you. When someone tells you, hey, come on and… “Leave me, I want to do something else, go on the Internet.” No. Stay around your father and see what he does, and then you will see that you start to learn certain things just by looking or sometimes even putting your hand and helping a little bit to hammer a nail, to repair something, to cut something. In this way, you get to learn and you don’t even realize what good it will do you later.

I, in my time, liked to learn a lot, I don’t mean school here, because I wasn’t too great there, but wherever I saw someone doing something, I was watching. And now, when I got here, it came so handy I can build, as they say, a house from the bottom up because I saw and then I put my hand to work and did it myself. I mean, in any field I have an idea. Whom I saw doing something, I sat next to him to learn. I started asking why he did it that way and not otherwise. After that, I was able to figure out if he was wrong or not. So they all helped me in life.

As I’ve said, let’s always learn from everything around us, because years go by and you will grow up. After childhood you will be sorry, childhood stays childhood and that’s why I said don’t rush, let it flow beautifully, as it comes. At least until the age of 18, when you finish high school, remain a child, enjoy everything around you, a flower, a plant, a tree, a bird, an animal, a person, friends, to be able to enjoy living childhood, not virtually, to live it for real. If you are in the countryside, especially in nature, stay barefoot as much as possible.

All summer I was barefoot, I was wearing shoes only at school, at church and during winter, the rest of the time I was barefoot. In this way, the body is immunized and you feel, rejoice, step on the grass, on the ground differently. And those in the city, as I’ve said before, try to do a sport so that you can spend your energy and avoid phones and Internet as much as you can because they are slowly destroying you. And don’t get carried away by friendships with those who seem cool to you at school, in the neighborhood, in the village or I don’t know where, because they smoke, do others and don’t accept you there if you don’t do the same. You don’t need to have such friendships, stay original yourselves.

Stay pure and beautiful! Leave them, because you’ll see where they end up with all these things later. Because I have also known such people, who, when they reached a certain age, drinkers, smokers, junkies, they destroyed their lives were unable to start a family because they were “cool” during their time. So don’t try to imitate others or long for, beg them to accept you in certain entourages. Otherwise it’ll seem to you that you are missing out. No. If you stay as you should, you as a girl or a boy, fair and good, they will ask you for your friendship when they have a hard time. So don’t let yourself be influenced by everything that’s bad around you.

And always ask for advice. And another thing, don’t run away from church, go every Sunday, even if sometimes it’s hard for you, or you prefer to do other things. Go! You don’t realize how much help you receive at Church, at the Divine Liturgy. You sit and pray as you can, as a child, younger, older. You tell God and Mother of God everything that’s in your heart, in your mind, no one has to hear you. You talk and tell her: “Mother of God, I want to do this in life….” or “God, I want you to help me, to enlighten me, help me, enlighten me. Look, at school, I don’t really study there, help me, enlighten me!” Exams, [or] something else… And when the years go by, you reach 15 – 16 years old, you start, as girl, liking by a boy or vice versa, pay great attention to all this. All with patience. And let us always tell God and Mother of God everything. And after the age of 7, you have to confess a bit, to tell the foolish little things you do. Go tell them all to father: “Look, father, I did this too, I did that”, because he absolves you and lifts off all that weight and you enjoy childhood again, enjoy everything that is beautiful.

Try, try, as I again repeat myself, to stay children and enjoy your childhood, and not to want, from an early age, miniskirts because you saw them in an ad. There’s no point, you don’t need to show others that your body is beautiful. No, time will come for that too. Enjoy what is beautiful, what is pure and whenever you have the opportunity, talk to your parents, grandparents or to elderly people. Whom you see needing help, go and help them carry a bag when they come back from the market, go and help them and ask them: “Grandma, grandpa, how did you live your life? Give me as a child, as a young person, some advice. How do I avoid mistakes?” Do this thing because it will be of great use to you and you will keep that advice in your life.

You don’t even know when you’re going to be hit hard and you’ll remember it, because the elders have their value. We don’t even realize. I also remember the elders of my time, my grandmother, who was telling us a lot. There was another elder, who was a night watchman, all of us children used to sit next to him and he was telling us all his memories, and we were enjoying all his memories, lived by him, as a man who, as they say, was leaving his life behind.

What else do I tell you to give you a little courage? No matter how hard life may seem to us, the way you look at it with your eyes, with your mind, as much as you understand, know that life is beautiful. Never give up on life! You see, there are children for whom something doesn’t work and they throw themselves from I don’t know where. Never! It’s not worth it!

There is always a new beginning, meaning, there is always a new chance. Whatever we have done wrong in life, whatever we have done in life, no matter how many hardships we’ve encountered, been hit by, have been oppressed by, wronged by, it doesn’t matter. A door will always open for us, too, “The sun will rise on our street as well.” God is always waiting for us and gives us a new chance to rejoice. No matter how hard it is for you, don’t give up on life and if you really can’t go on anymore, run to a father, to a priest, somewhere, to tell him your trouble, to confess, to have him absolve you, so you can rejoice. In order to get out of certain states we are going through, that’s why, we must have God by our side.

And always wear a cross around your neck. You don’t know how much power it gives you. And when you leave home, always say “God help me, Mother of God help me!” If you can, in a pocket there should be an icon of the Mother of God. Because, you know how it is, you have the icon there and in difficult times also at school, if someone bullies you, if you don’t know something, you [can] hold the icon in your pocket and say: “Mother of God, help me!” and you see how Mother of God intervenes immediately. So let’s ask for her help.

Have the Mother of God as a mother, permanently. Know that she’s never too busy to help you. In any situation, she is next to us. Call her because she never leaves you, She is, somehow, the true mother. You have the mother who gave birth to you, but Mother of God is above all. Love Mother of God dearly and ask for Her help! And as I told you before, don’t rush to waste your childhood. Enjoy it as much as possible because you will have enough time to be mature, to face all the worries of life. Mosquitoes are starting to bother me, it’s towards the evening now.

Try to taste life beautifully, day by day, moment by moment with what it offers around, in the family. Discussions with mom, with dad, play games together, challenge them, tell them to stop watching TV or the Internet. “Leave these and play with us. Come on, tell us something more from your life, how did you meet, how you fell in love, tell us so we know how this life is.” Ask them to tell you from their own experience and to make them, if they’re not how they should be, to have time for you. Invent different games together, go out of town if you are from the city, especially on Sunday evenings or all weekend, go to a monastery, to the mountain, enjoy the fresh air a bit. You don’t even know how much it oxygenates the mind, nourishes the heart, the lungs.

Go on foot and climb the mountain, with a backpack on, with some water, and go by foot, without phones, dad and children with mom, if possible climb and enjoy what God has created: all are so beautiful we don’t even realize God created such a beautiful world, our environment, so beautiful, to just know how to take advantage of it, to rejoice, otherwise we’ll regret it.

Yes, dear ones, kids? No matter how old you are, don’t forget what I have told you so far! Let them all follow their natural course and take advantage of these beautiful years, because you will not meet them again. Times are as we see them and you will have time for worries, fashion, time for long nails. Try now to be as simple as possible, dressed as casual as possible, so you can run. Try not to be wrapped in tight clothes, not being able to play as a kid, wearing clothes so tight that you cannot move or with long painted nails so that you can’t play with other children because of the nails, no, or boys who are starting to grow and remove their hair… no, no such things. Grow up real men, not on heels. We’ll put that aside.

If God made you a girl, be feminine, be a beautiful child, who grows up beautifully, and enjoy your childhood. If you are a boy, be a boy who assumes his future as a man, grow up a real man, not becoming feminine, it doesn’t make sense. A woman always likes a man to be a man, and a man likes a woman to be a woman. To remain herself, as God created her.

My dear children, as I said, be close to God, don’t miss church on any Sunday, confess, Commune, be kind to those around you. Don’t be proud, contemptuous, but be kind to everyone, to your classmates, at kindergarten, at school, further, at high school. With respect. Don’t enter the entourages that are not good, because these destroy.

This way, being kind, especially to the elderly, help as much as you can, on the street, with something, you see poor people, go ask them “Do you need some water?” or maybe you can help them carry their luggage. As much as possible, do good, because all this will come back to you later, God will reward you, and all your life, when you’ll have a hard time, He will always throw your way people that’ll help you. Try to make your life as simple as possible and then it becomes as beautiful as possible.

That’s about all I wanted to tell you. I haven’t thought about it beforehand, I said what came to mind, maybe there are a lot to say, but just a few things… I really wanted to address myself to kids because you are the future of the country, if you’ll grow up beautifully, you’ll be valuable people for the country.

Look, Ursuleț also wants attention. He saw that I was talking here and he wants attention too. I have three kittens here: “Little Bear,” “Little Tiger” and “Jaguar.” They have grown up around me more, but we don’t keep them inside the house, nor do I allow them in my arms, but now I’ll let it so you see how quickly it tries to get noticed. He, Ursuleț, was somehow the closest, wherever I went, in the forest, he was always after me. I’ve made them a cage outside so that they would have a place to stay. We don’t usually allow animals in the house, the house is made for man. For the animals you make a cage outside, where they would have their own place. You don’t have to get to somehow develop an addiction to it, meaning, to turn your life upside down because of the animals in the house, quarrels because of them, no. They have their own place: you like them, you take care of them, but without destroying everything around you because of the animals. It doesn’t have to go that far. I’ve allowed him on my lap now for you, so that you can see him too, yes, dear ones? Alright, I’ll leave you now. Mosquitoes, again.

May the Mother of God help you, give you strength and do not forget what I have told you! It will do you good in life, during difficult moments, you will remember these words. First of all, I would like you not to forget the Mother of God. Call her at any moment of life. She will help you! Yes, children, enjoy childhood as much as you can! Don’t rush to grow up! May God help us! May the Mother of God help us!

That’s it, Ursuleț, you’ve had enough, it’s over. Look, you filled me with dust. I let you be a star, right? He likes it when I sit on the grass to come and nestle a little. Now I allowed him in my arms, but I usually leave him by my foot. I’ve allowed him a bit so you can see him too. Yes? He’s the star over here. Alright, Ursuleț, we’re done.

May the Mother of God help us, children!

[Talking to the cat:] Get down! You covered me with hairs. Now I have to dust myself off. Enough Ursuleț!

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