Romania: Raising Children – Fr. Pimen Vlad

Listen to Father Pimen Vlad as he tells us about the splendors of our homeland and about raising children according to the traditions of our people.

A beautiful clip with beautiful words and beautiful landscapes about beautiful people.

Enjoy!

Look dear ones, we meet again. I’ve stopped by the roadside, as I’m traveling somewhere in Maramureș. I’m right next to the road, but it’s a beautiful area, cars will bother us a bit. Not many pass, though the occasional car whizzes by, just ten meters away. But I liked this place, there is a bench here and a place to park the car, as there’s not much room elsewhere. You can hear the cars, I hope there won’t be too many.

What else can I tell you about Romania? You’ve seen, I’ve spoken to you [about it] before. I’m heading to beautiful regions in Maramureș now, but before this, I also visited Sibiu, and I liked it very much. Why? I stayed somewhere with a family, and from there, we went on the Transfăgărășan, a road I had never been on before. How beautiful it is up there at Bâlea Lake! We drove there and then strolled on foot. We have so many wonderful places in Romania! I hope you’ve also been on the Transfăgărășan, because I know that many have travelled to many countries for vacations, but we have our own wonderful places. That’s why I’m trying to encourage you a little bit to explore our country.

Even those of you who have gone abroad to work, when you come in the summer, when you can, visit our wonderful places. They are truly wonderful. What shall I talk to you about? I stayed with a family that has adopted four little girls. Four wonderful little girls. I fully rejoiced. That is, I too became a child. I rejoiced with them; we went on walks. I, too, played along with them in different games. God did not create us to dwell solely on material things, without rejoicing. We have so many wonderful places, and as I said, let us visit them and rejoice in them.

And so, wandering through this world, I understood a few things. And do you know which ones? That parents don’t know how to prepare their children for life. I’ve spoken to different now-grown children who shared that, growing up, their parents did not know how to prepare them – they were not prepared for life and they faced many things they had no idea about. Or the parents were too harsh. Instead of standing by their side, to help them, they would be legalistic, “What? My child did that? Why would he do such a thing?” So, when they did something, the parents became wild, so to speak, but they hadn’t prepared their children for what awaits them in life, and they were not by their side.

I even recall a mother from another part of the country. She had a 13-year-old daughter and she said to me, “Father, I’ve prepared her for anything. Besides teaching her the right thing, I told her, ‘My daughter, know that I am here for you, anytime. Whatever challenges you face in this world, know that I am here. You will make mistakes, you will fall, you will get up, but know that I will welcome you with open arms, whatever you do. Even if… you get into a situation… you are young, you will fall in love, and you may even find yourself pregnant, like it or not. Just remember to come home, not to commit another sin. Come to me, for I will embrace you with love and I will raise your child.'” A mother who prepared her child for any situation. Not that she should do such a thing, but [if] she were in that situation, she shouldn’t run away from home or do different things to kill her children. No – she would know that her mother is there, helping her. And do you know what this means? That’s what God did if we look in the Gospels in the parable of the prodigal son: the moment he became full of himself as they say, and took his inheritance, and went and squandered it, the father gave it to him. When he returned, with nothing but tattered clothes, the father welcomed him back with open arms. He showed that he had been waiting for him, and he dressed him properly again, and placed the ring [on his finger] and everything. That is what parents should be for their children. Do you understand? Because life is harsh, the children are unprepared, and they face certain challenges. Parents must stand by them!

Recently… I sat at a table with several families and the parents were very upset because they had learned that their child, somewhere at his 18th birthday, had a few puffs of a cigarette and they were set against him. The father said, “I won’t even talk to him. I’ll keep my distance so he understands the weight of his mistake.” I told him it is a serious mistake [to stay away]. “You can keep your distance from him, coldly, for a week or a month, but I want to see how you recover these things [that were lost during this time]. You might wait for the child to come around, but one day he will say, ‘Dad doesn’t care about me!’ and then he will fall into other troubles. No. It’s better to take him aside and have a talk with him. That means you solve your problems. Talk to him: ‘Look, my child, it’s nothing, it’s human. You did this, but be careful! Avoid it, because once you become enslaved by the passion, you can’t leave them—whether it’s cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, or countless other things. Why get there when you can avoid it beforehand?'” These problems are always resolved through conversation with children, not by avoiding them, nor by yelling and screaming, because [if we do that] they distance themselves and won’t reveal anything.

We must prepare them for life by spending a lot of time with them, talking like friends, helping them open up so they can share everything with us. This way, we can truly help them. Look at the little girls, they grow up, and often their mothers don’t prepare them for life. As they enter womanhood, they need to understand what it means, how they should manifest, how to behave. Further on, they grow up, they must be ready for life. Try to be there for them and help them.

You should know that love always wins. We don’t solve problems through other means but through love, for love never fails. Yes, my dear ones, I share this with you because, as I travel through the country, I encounter various situations. I speak with people and children, some who have faced challenges, and I realize this. A lot of care and attention [is needed], because there are many snares in this world that lure our children. We must not push them into these snares through our coldness, through our negligence, through our lack of time for them. That is, by having all our time occupied, and leaving them in front of the TV or the internet, to get their questions answered [there]. No, let’s take the time and be there for them, and then you will see that even if they stumble, they will get up again. And if they know their parents are there with open arms, they will go to them and share what they are going through.

Yes, dear ones, what else can I tell you… I didn’t even think about [what to say] beforehand. I stopped when I saw this beautiful place, and I said, “Let me tell you something,” since even Fr. Theologos sent me a message, saying “Send me another video for next Thursday,” and I thought “Let me do something.” Yes, we have a wonderful country – don’t forget this – and very good and beautiful people.

Travelling around the country, some asked me, “How do you see the country? How do you see the people?” I told them I have never seen a more beautiful country than ours, nor kinder and more beautiful people than ours. We have them, we just need to discover them. And do you know how? Through love, not by waiting for it from others. Let us go towards them with love, with understanding, with kindness, helping them, and in this way, you’ll see how many good things we’ll encounter, we’ll find, and have in our life.

You should know that these things don’t come on their own if we remain indifferent. We must engage in helping others, in offering our love. And then, God will grant us joy, love, and all the rest. We are not made to live in selfishness on this earth. No, we are here to support each other, to stand together, and to encourage one another. In this way we rise up, together with another towards God, towards Heaven, as they say. If not, we can have wealth, remain in loneliness, we remain delighting in material things, but dry on the inside, without joy. Just like a food without salt or sugar, which has no taste. Yes, while we could have all the other things. Do you understand, dear ones?

Try a little bit to be kinder, a little bit more humble. Some also say that our Romanians abroad, not all of them, just some of them, are beginning to look down on those who stayed in the country: “We are abroad, we are great.” Don’t do that, dear ones, because you’re harming yourselves. You have to appreciate the Romanians left in the country, because they stayed in the country, they struggle here, they work, and you find the country as it should be, upon your return. Even if it is maligned by many claiming it’s not as is should be, that something or other is missing, you should know that the country is beautiful.

Respect the Romanians who didn’t go abroad, who are here, because they have kept the flame alive. They sustain this country so that you have a place to return to and enjoy. Do not look down on them, respect them for this and give them the honor they deserve. Just because you are abroad does not mean that… I know so many cases of how hard it is there too, how hard you work for a piece of bread, the lowly jobs our Romanians work there. Is that a reason to look down on others when you return to the country? Maybe in Romania you would not do those jobs, but there you do. Remember, you are all brothers; respect one another, give each other respect, love each other, and help each other. Alright, dear ones?

I’ll end with that, so as not to drag on. May the Mother of God and the good God help us to be better and more loving! May the Lord help us!

[Video continues]

Look, my dear ones, I will try to [add to] the little video that I sent yesterday to Fr. Theologos. I was on the road, traveling toward Maramureș, somewhere along the way. Now that I’ve arrived somewhere in Maramureș, I thought to add a few more things to that video, since I’m here in the beautiful lands of Maramureș. Now I’m right in the Tibleș Mountains, somewhere high up. I’m with a lovely family, the husband drove me up here with a jeep to enjoy the mountains and I thought I’d take the opportunity to tell you a few more things.

What shall I tell you? There are beautiful mountains, that’s why I’ve always told you, enjoy the wonders of our country! Right here, as far as the eye can see, there are only mountains and forests, beautiful places, and wonderful people. And here’s something traditional from Maramureș: upon my arrival, I was welcomed with bread and salt, by people dressed in the national costume, beautifully, according to the local tradition. How beautiful it is when people still preserve the tradition and live it, when they put it into practice.

Do you see that our country permanently has wonderful places and remarkable people? That’s why we have to take care of it, preserve it, and as I have said to those from abroad, to understand, little by little, that the time is coming to return to the homeland. Whenever it is, to accept this idea, to prepare their children for this, whenever the time comes. Because we have too many wonderful places and it would be a pity not to rejoice in them and live beautifully in our homeland, as it is possible here too. It’s possible, no matter how difficult it may seem.

It’s beautiful and as I’ve said before… let me go back to one thing. Even though I am here, – it stayed in my mind – when I was in Sibiu… because at the beginning of the video I shared something about Sibiu how I went high up on the Transfăgărășan, to Bâlea Lake. I stayed with a family that has four little girls. I will ask Fr. Theologos to add some pictures I sent him from there. A very beautiful family, a family that I grew fond of. Of course, I really like to be in the world of children, to play and to feel like a child. What I wanted to recall from here [is that] upon leaving it was hot outside, 33°C, with a [blazing] sun, the heat was burning… As I approached the car, I loaded my things, I put my hand on the car and I felt it was burning as the car was black. I opened the door a bit to let in some air and went back into the house and I said goodbye to the family. Obviously, after spending two wonderful days together, a bond had formed and they were all crying.

After we hugged, I opened the door and went outside, where it started to rain. Imagine, when I entered, everything was ablaze with heat, and within two minutes, immediately it rained. But it was raining through the rays of the sun, as they say. The atmosphere had been so stifling and now you could see tears from the heavens, falling to the earth. The family I was with wiped their eyes, saying, “I think because of the tears it seems to us that it’s raining.” But it was raining, a rain unlike any I had ever seen, through the rays of the sun as if the sky was weeping. Those in the family even said, “Father, look, even the heavens are crying, not just us!” It was like… they were glistening tears, falling effortlessly.

It rained on the car for five minutes, cooling it slightly, even if the water was warm, it cooled it a bit given how hot it was. I left, and after starting the car and driving away, just a few meters down the road, there was not a drop of water anywhere. It was like a blessing let’s say, upon their home. Just that, a five-minute rain, and further, everything was dry. I can say that it moved me. I said the rain was from God, for the love of those people and for their tears. Somehow, with their tears, they managed to persuade God to pour a few tears from the sky, that’s how beautiful the rain and the atmosphere were. You see, even in the smallest things, God makes His presence felt, showing us He is with us, comforting us in all we do, as long as we maintain our connection with Him.

Yes, dear ones, I wanted to add this and I repeat: rejoice in everything around you—your loved ones, your family, everyone else. Forgive each other, help one another, and rejoice! In the evening, hug each other, express how much you love each other. Do not fall asleep with hatred or conflict! Remember to live beautifully, for that is why God created us! When I gaze upon so much beauty… I’ve stopped here on a mountain peak. You see flowers in the back, here’s a stump. It’s an untraveled path, yet it’s so lovely here! All around are fir trees, a sight that never ceases to delight. That’s why I wanted to make this little video, to add a few words to the other one, to share this joy with you, to remind you of the beautiful country we have, and to never lose touch with God and the Mother of God! Do you understand, dear ones?

May the Mother of God help us, and may she protect us always! May the Lord help us!

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